Parenting is a fun-filled but hectic journey for every parent. You have to go through a lot of different phases during your child’s development phase. Mostly, parents want their children to get going as per their command instantly. However, that’s not the right approach to adopt, always. You need to communicate to the kid in a manner that what you ask is done. As a parent, you need to learn ways that make your kid listen to you i.e. a mix of soft tone, firm approach, attitude of a friend, do ‘whatever you wish to’ attitude and even ‘I’m always there for you’ approach. The secret of getting kids listen to you lies in ‘understanding them well’.
Why Don’t Kids Listen to You Always?
Know that the priority list of kids keeps changing and so do their response to parent’s commands. If your kid is in a frame of mind where he needs attention, you can get him to do what you want, if you hear him properly. As parents, you need to understand that a child does not understand things as nicely as you do.
Sometimes it is difficult for a child to understand the benefit of eating the meal at that very moment or brushing the teeth daily before going to bed and so on. Well, no matter what the age of your child is, you definitely want him to listen to what you teach and say.
Here is a list of factors parents need to consider for being heard and followed by kids.
Watch Your Style of Communication
Each parent has a different style of communication. The way you communicate to the child has the direct impact on his reaction. This is because the way you talk, act and behave is what your child would take up. He would also continue the same tone of speaking in future.
Different Types of Communication Ways among Parents: Know Which One Works Best?
- Aggressive – These types of parents are always on a loud pitch and prefer yelling rather than normal talking. They often put the kids down using attacking words. The children of aggressively talking parents can react in many different ways like ignoring the orders given by parents constantly, feeling fearful and yelling back etc. How can you get your kid to listen to you with the use of harsh words?
- Passive – These parents speak very soft and cautiously. Their words and tone of speaking are so polite that children often neglect the need to obey them and are unaffected with their orders. This ignorance ultimately leads the passive parents into aggressive ones.
- Assertive – These parents use a clear, confident, consistent, positive and warm tone to talk to their children. This way of communication makes children realize that the parents actually know what they are about and they are sure to listen to that.
Assertive communication is the most effective and smartest way to make your child listen to you. Parents must monitor the way they talk to the kids for better results.
Use Fewer Words
Make sure your message is well-constructed. Avoid long orders and be straight to the point like pick that up on your way to the room, drink this ASAP etc. This is because using too many words can dilute the attention of your child.
Use Name to Address
It is important that your child actually knows that the following message is for him. You should try to call the child by his name before ordering him. This would make him attentive and listen in one go.
Have an Eye Contact
This helps in connecting with the child. This is essential for a face-to-face conversation. An eye contact allows the child concentrate on what you are saying and also lets him feel the seriousness of the matter.
Use Positive Language
This point aims at the words that you use while communicating with your child. Make sure you start the word with a positive word rather than adding no, don’t etc. For example ‘don’t put that bottle out of fridge’ can be replaced with ‘do put the bottle back into the fridge after use’.
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Lastly, the use of right kind of words encourages the child to listen to your order. It makes them feel happier too. You should adopt the habit of avoiding words that are ridiculing and demeaning to the children’s interests while learning how to get your child listen to you. Neither a soft approach nor a strict tone works at all times – parents need to strike a balance.